Breathe Easy

Kyle has his first day of school today and I keep freaking out. This is the first time he is going to be away from us. Not to mention that he is going to be in school for about 8 hours. He is going to do well and get along with kids but I am a very untrusting parent. I trust no one with my son except his mother and that is because I have to.
With all the kidnappings, sexual assaults and murders of kids it makes sense to not trust people. You don’t get blessed with trust and honesty once you assume any authoritative role in society.

I am trying to work through it and I am trying to calm myself down but it is hard to do. It is all I am thinking about. At least I had a chance to see him before I had to go to work. I would have liked to get him ready and drop him off with Dawn but circumstances beyond my control prevented me to do so. Oh well, at least he knew I wanted to be there which is more then I ever had. I think that is more of the problem that I am having. I never had a family like he has and I don’t want Kyle to ever feel like I have. I don’t ever want to look back and wish I did it any different. If I have to sacrifice everything to give him that I will.

Soon it will get better and it will seem like it is not that big of a deal but I will always want to be there. The only difference is that I would be able to deal with it better. I make sure that he is protected and I need to trust in that.

And he is very excited......